All the plans in the world

While I was pregnant I started a scrap book to give to the baby when he is older so he can see where it all started. Every other day I would set out the pages find photos to go inside everything from scan to bump pics to my childhood pics, I’d write little bits about his dad and I how we met and our hopes for him and his future. Since my baby boy has got here not a single page have I updated. I’ve been putting photos, festival wrist bands and gig stubs in the book so they don’t disappear  but haven’t actually stuck them down or wrote about them. I wanted so bad to do a week by week update all the way up to a year old so that nothing got missed but instead it has sat there having dust looking sorry for itself wondering if it will ever fulfil it’s scrapbooking destiny (a bit dramatic I know). 

Same with the photo albums I have been printing off photographs each month using the app Freeprints (use code cwalters170 if you’re thinking of using it) I’ve been putting the dare on the back of each one with a sentence of what I was feeling or what was happening in each photo. They then get put into an album in date order but I’ve done two albums already and I’m not even two months into his baby pictures. I’ll probably look back and ask myself why I took so many pictures? 

I’ve also stated a video I wanted to give to him when he was older too which is the film version of his scrapbook just he gets to see moving images instead. I just need to add the part when he was born and it’s done then I need to put it on some kind of storage device and hope it lasts the tests of time.

Why do I do this? Why am I such an eager beaver? So overly ambitious in what I want to get done only happy if it’s done in the way I had planned in my head. 

I guess I just want my gorgeous dumpling faced baby boy to know that he is loved beyond all measure. I am trying my hardest to ensure he always knows that. I know this stage is the best stage when everything is so fresh, so exciting and so magical. If this feeling could be bottled up and distributed all over the world there would surely be world peace. I will get this scrapbook up to date! I know I shouldn’t think this way but if anything happened to me the scrapbook would be something he could read and look at knowing that his mumma put it together with him in mind. There will be little nuggets of advice, hopefully letters that he can open on his significant birthdays and hopes and dreams for our future so he knows that I was always thinking about him.

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